The manager of the Linton Travel Tavern. Susan appears to be a stereotypical front-desk worker, with a dazzling smile and sickly sweet manner, but even these forced skills are not enough to deal with Alan's clumsy, half-hearted flirting and mindless anecdotes. Alan frequently makes tactless comments to Susan about her appearance (once suggesting to her that she "could have been throwing up all night" but that her smile would not falter). In reaction to these comments, Susan's painted-on smile is sometimes momentarily replaced by a look of shock and bemusement. Susan displays a general dislike of Alan, becoming increasingly bored of his feeble attempts at conversation, and at one stage being terrified by Alan's poorly-planned practical joke in which he dresses as a zombie and creeps up on her at reception. Nevertheless, she never says a harsh word to Alan - at least, until she finally tells Alan what she thinks of him at his going-away party.